The Epic End of Day III in the Northwest

 Some more Mount Rainier National Park photos. It was an awesome day, certainly one of the more beautiful places I've been to. Check out the waterfall off in the distance. We could see this from a roadside overlook, and shortly after we hiked down to the beautiful little set of falls below. It was a little later on in the day and I think we were both marginally concerned about the onset of dusk as we hiked. There was one other set of hikers on the trail, a set of young twenty somethings, two girls and a guy. There was a couple and the other was clearly a third wheel, and she had decided not to follow the love birds down to the bottom, so we saw her headed back up as we hiked down, even though that group had probably advanced 10 minutes ahead of us. All of this gave us a weird sense of urgency and we rushed up and down the trail.

 The gorge pictured here was pretty spectacular. This was another short hike, probably a mile round trip where you walk along the top of the gorge over and then back down the other side. I was trying to find the name of this attraction, but so far after the time it has escaped my mind and I was having a little difficulty making much sense of the maps I Googled.

 This I believe is the view of the gorge from the road. I feel like a punch line, some distant person you don't know showing you a boring set of slides. And below, here's Kate on a trail.

 Here's Kate on a bridge. Ha-ha! The sign actually explains that only one person should be on this bridge at a time, which of course made me bounce merrily across it because I'm a knuckle dragging mouth breathing fool. No, I'm not joking, at least not about the mouth breathing.

 Here's Kate taking a picture of the river which you'll probably get to see later. I know you can't wait but try to scroll down slowly.

 I am the Kate the Great and I will smote thee as I flair my nostrils. Muhahahahaha!

 Taking these weird tree shots was Kate's idea, it involved lying down on the ground to get the height of the great giants in the frame. Yes. There were ants. But there were also mosquitoes at the higher elevations so either way. Insects. What are you going to do.

 Dude... these trees are like totally radical man. Righteous!

 Look, vacation just makes me shine with roly poly jolliness. That, and late night snacks. I was probably thinking about eating some late night snacks in this shot. Mmmmm salsa.

 Kate, I've got this great idea, I'll look like I'm holding up this massive tree! Totally original right? Damn I'm so creative I could just pee myself in excitement.

 I know, I know.. why the hell are you seeing this bridge again? Well smart ass, I have to go back out the way I came in, so there.

 Kate's photo from earlier. Worth it!

At the end of day three we made it to Portland where we stayed at the Shilo Inn "Rose Garden" in Portland. This place was ridiculous. I mean it was comfortable but it was the weirdest clash of patterns old and modern furniture, dated decor. Quite frankly it was fantastic in its total lack of effort to really look appropriate. It was trying to be funky, it was probably trying to be normal, but it so clearly was not. 

When we arrived some older couple in there 60s was checking in with their 90 year old father who they got a separate room for. What happened was straight out of a Woody Allen movie, I was getting frustrated and losing hair just being near them. Despite the wait, coping with my cramped legs and sore feet, it almost was worth it because they were unintentionally hilarious, as was the super-pierced and tattooed stoner chick with a really bad cold that was working the desk. The wife was a complete drama queen, she looked a little like Jerry Seinfeld's mom from the sitcom, and the husband looked like Larry David. We watched as she passively aggressively made comments as the husband checked in, and as she asked whether he did something seconds he actually did. It was painful and pleasurable all at the same time. Like a live version of real awkward moment from "The Office" happening right in front of us. We learn that they are from New York, and somewhere in the middle of this show the man asks where the nearest bar is. As soon as they are done checking in, and as soon as Gramps had been brought out to his room the couple steps outside as we take a big sigh and try to check in. But it wasn't over, as I'm about to speak we hear the we the wife lay down napalm of the harshest bile mother f-ing language I've ever heard, right out side the door. There were c-words of both varieties laid down among all of the other normal garden variety swears. It was a potty mouth masterpiece and we all stood there slack jawed, totally aware of why this dude had been desperate to find his way to the bar. 

So we check in, and as we head back to the room the woman in front of us fell down the stairs (retrospectively I wonder if she had been knocking back the sauce on the ride there). Kate and I rushed to help her up, Kate offered to take her bags up to the next floor as there was no elevator. She crankily brushes us off. 

I won't go into too much detail but there was also a whole fiasco where our room keys wouldn't work. The other couple is going through the same thing. I also neglected to mention the part where the dopey check in gal mentions how the Shilo Inn only served vegan creamer at their continental breakfast because they don't have a Portland issued permit to dump dairy products down the drain. I'm not sure on the validity of her beliefs, but it was hysterical listening to the old guy mutter about how he had entered into "Portlandia." 

The concierge girl proceeded to drop the "Oh it's because they are from New York," on us after they moved on, to which Kate responded "I'm from New York."

Anyway, we went to McDonalds for dinner which was awful. (shocker) As we settled in to the Shilo later, later Kate went out to get ice or something and she saw the old couple come back from the bar across the street all tipsy and happy. A fitting end to our third adventurous day.